…and Why Aren’t You Busy, Mr. Romeo?
by YBLalat

The night was rather late. A few hours more and then it will hit tomorrow. It was about time for me to brush my teeth and hit the sack. I got up from my study table and walked towards the next bedroom – no one was there. Rolling waves of hysterical laughter came echoing in from the living room. Everybody seemed to be enjoying themselves in front of the TV. Some were on the couch and some were lying on their backs and on the mattress. No one noticed my sly presence into their vicinity – they were all fixed heavily on the TV. I stared at the clock on the wall and noted that the time was really, really late and yet these people are still there watching the idiot’s box. Don’t they have classes tomorrow, I asked myself.

“What’s on the TV, guys?”, I asked.
“Oh, I don’t the name of the show, but it is okay – very funny”, replied Pyan.
“You have classes or not, eh?”, I asked again, although the answer was pretty obvious.
“Yeah, but mine is at ten”, said Anas.
“…and mine is at two”, answered Pyan.
“I don’t have morning classes tomorrow but my TA period is at noon. I hope that I won’t be attacked heavily again like yesterday”, responded Mamat lengthily.

His TA period is when he has to sit around and made himself available for junior students to ask him for help with regards to their C++ assignments. The pay is good but the job is a bit tedious.

“So, spending a bit of our precious spare time, are we?”, I asked mockingly.
“Our precious, precious youth and vigor, is it?”, I asked again after nobody responded.
“You guys looked relaxed, as if you have nothing else to do. No more chores to be done, no more duties to fulfill – sheer liberation. And you chose the TV as your savior, as your Magdalena”, I continued further, this time merely lecturing to the dry wall.

Suddenly, a low-flying airplane full of burning ideas hit through the sides of my skull – Eureka! A sure hit! A definite bull’s eye! No one can escape this!

“Anas, do you know what today’s date is?”, I asked him in a rather hasty voice.
“Err…no”, he replied reluctantly and without budging his eyeballs far from the TV.
“Pyan, do you know?” I inquired the one was the nearest to where I was standing.
“It’s the 13th. Why did you ask?”, he answered back, reacting a bit annoyed.
“Oh, yes, the 13th – the 13th of February”, I said with a crooked smile.
“So?” retorted Pyan.
“Hm…in another few hours, today will become tomorrow, right?”
“Cut the crap, man”, he insisted.
“…and tomorrow is what date again?”
“You just asked us about the date! Now, quiet down!”, Mamat fired back at me.
“It’s the 14th, you jackass! The 14th!”, I screamed.
“Quiet down, I say! I can’t hear what the bloody TV is saying!”
“The 14th of February, you bloody idiots! It will be Valentine’s Day tomorrow!”

Awkward silence soon followed, with the echoes of my shout still bouncing back and forth the wall of the living room. There was a tremendous amount of energy released with that clinching last say of mine – unfortunate it was not as effective as I imagined it would be. For a few seconds, I just stood there in a semi-jumping posture of a cheerleader.

“But why aren’t you guys busy? Why aren’t you dipping your nose into the hassle of writing your own poetic limericks? Why aren’t you busy cutting and pasting and coloring your self-made Valentine cards? Why is the telephone not being used to call your significant others? Why is the internet not utilized fully to maintain that long distance affair that you guys have with your “Plan B” girlfriend? Why are you guys watching the fucking TV when tomorrow is going to be Valentine’s Day? Why in the hell, oh God!”

Still, no response whatsoever. Okay, maybe a little diplomacy would do the trick, I thought, maybe a bit of slow talking would open up to them - here goes.

“But, come on, man. Why? Hey you, Anas, you have several nice ones, don’t you? I mean, come on, man, you actually got to be asked to go out on dates. Come on, where are they now, eh? Where is your maintenance effort, I would say? Why aren’t you busy, oh Mr. Romeo? And you Pyan, you have a steady, don’t you? The one with the picture on your desk? The one with the red dress? Huh? Well? And Mamat, hah, Mamat, you can’t fool me anymore. You have adik angkat queuing up for you from Elmwood to St. Anthony, right? Don’t fuck with my head, man, you’ve been having adik angkat since high school! So? Well? Hello! Yoo-hoo! Valentine’s Day is tomorrow!”

“What bull, man. Nobody gives a damn about Valentine’s Day” said Pyan heartlessly.
“Go to bed, asshole; tomorrow’s your happy, happy love day”, joined Mamat.
“Buzz off, you romantic piece of shit!” uttered Anas sarcastically, without blinking his eyes.

Aghast, I was shocked to hear that coming from my roommates. They have changed! They were no more that girl-obsessed, sweet-talking, chocolate-buying, ice-cream-eating fools that I knew them in the past. They have turned into the ideal man, the perfect male – cold, insensitive, heartless and oblivious. They are now the best guy buddy candidates. No more being-left-alone-on-Saturday-nights incident and no more having-to-listen-to-guys-complaining-about-their-girl issue. No more girls and no more spending money on girls. The end of pain and misery and loneliness.